There are a lot of details to this question, but me and my ex were together for a year and half and have a 5 and half month old, its like we cant let go of each other, even though he says he's "made up his mind" in the sense that he think if we got back together we would just break up again. I mean not seeing each other or slightly talking is kind of out of the question, due to the fact we have a child together. How can we fully move on, if we do have to see and talk to each other still. I know he misses me and all that, he has told me, like on the weekend actually (long story), but he just has convinced himself it wont work, and I dont know if its because he got scared of the commitment of having a baby together etc, or if maybe we actually wont work. I just know we are constantly battling how we really feel, and I feel like if this is how strong we feel, shouldn't that tell us something? Isnt it worth trying to work out, and work on what broke us up, because really we didnt even try.. it just kind of ended and I had to move home temporarily. I dunno, should I just give up, or maybe wait it out, or..I dont know. I probably know what everyone will say, get over it. So much easier said then done, maybe if there were some male perspective it would help. thanks a bunch.
well, i'm not a male, but i totally understand what you're trying to say here. well, first off, i dont think you should just give up yet. I mean, you said yourself you guys didnt completely try yet. Maybe now's the time too? Try for the sake of the baby. Because it's obvious you both love the baby, and sometimes the baby is what can keep couples together. It may take a while to get things to work out completely, but you never know until you've tried right? And personally i think that your ex has convinced himself that this relationship wont work out, because he probably is a little scared. I mean having a baby is a BIG THING. You both are probably still young, and not really ready for such a big commitment, but sometimes these things happen. He misses you, and you miss him. Try this for a little while. Once you've tried you can know that you TRIED, and if it doesnt work out then at least you have that satisfactory knowing you did try. and if it works out, then thank god you tried. Life is hard sometimes, especially when you have a baby with someone you loved very much , then the relationship tumbles, but give it one last try. At least for the sake of the baby.
and dont just "get over it" because exactly it's easily said then done. How can u just get over such a big thing?! so, yeah i support you all the way :]
Good luck, hun !
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While you may be used to dramatic, volatile relationships, he is not. he prefers to live in peace.
You should try going to anger management and after you get help, maybe he will try again.
One thing's in your favor: you have his child so he'll be close enough to see the changes and improvements you'll make. Maybe he'll like what he sees again.
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